Saturday, July 26, 2008

July 26: The War on Sag, Mush and Turkey-skin

All play and no work, my Jannie asserts, turns boyo into a flaccid drone. It’s all well and good to overindulge on lobster, swill beer, and overburden the hammock but, by gum, there’s work to be done too. So well has Jan put her stamp on every corner of the cabin that she’s now demanding renos on the renovations she initiated a decade ago. This year’s major interior project is a set of kitchen cabinets she likes quite a lot, but she cites Shakespeare’s immortal wisdom, “Perseverance keeps honour bright”, and has further shack improvements in full percolation.

I have my own motivation for getting to work. It was devastating enough to have pal Judith Hunt note my “saggy tits”. Then cousin-in-law Diane Campbell added to the misery by drawing attention to my “mushy bum”. Finally Jan herself drew notice to the “turkey skin” gathering around my neck. Enough! I fired up the chainsaw and cut four truckloads of birch, maple et al firewood with pal Bob Nagel. The mountain of firewood requires splitting of course and Jan swears nothing does so fine a job of firming up my saggy boobs and mushy bum as a protracted session with the splitting maul, wedges and axes. I’ll let you know how it goes.


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